Hukum Sanding

I just read about "Hukum Bersanding" in Utusan Malaysia today (11 September 2009). Ustaz Mohd. Farid Ravi Abdullah (he was my ex teacher, at that time, he only a practical teacher compare to know whereby he's a lecturer) said, if we want to bersanding with the intention to only to introduce both bride & groom to public, then it is fine to do sanding thingy.

But, there's certain condition whereby if we do the sanding for the sake of show off till we forget to perform our solat with mix of female & male, then it is prohibited to do the sanding ceremony. After reading this article, i can relate it to divorce issues among couples in Malaysia nowadays.

From Ministry of Woman Development's stats shows that lately there is an increasing number of divorce case among couples in Malaysia. I think, one of the factor contributes to this phenomena is no barakah (keberkatan) from Allah during our marriage / nikah. Why i said that? During our ceremony, there are many thing that Allah doesn't like. So how can Allah give His barakah if he dislike what we do.

First, if we do sanding thingy for the purpose to show off till we forget to perform our solat with reason to busy to treat our guess, will barakah stays in our marriage? Certainly no. How can we bless with barakah or rahmat if we ourselves don't perform something compulsary.

2nd, the article says, during sanding, we tend to do some 'renjis' thing. Initially, this ceremony being introduced by Hindu people. This ceremony main reason is to eliminate bad spirit (makhluk halus to be exact) from bothering our marriage while on the other hand, Allah says in Quran that only He can eliminate bad spirit & to Him only we must asked if we want anything. How can Allah give his bless when we do something like this?

3rd, all the time, we tend to waste so many thing. From hantaran to F&B, from souvenir to small2 things during majlis. There is certain people who put their daughter's 'price' till RM30K. What's that? During Rasulullah S.A.W era, Al Quran is enough for a hantaran / mas kahwin. No need to be so lavish. The main point is, we need some bless to run our marriage. Without this bless, how can we survive? Wasadtiah (average) is something that Allah & our Rasulullah S.A.W really encourage us to do. If we wasadtiah, bless from Allah will surround us.

As for me, i dream of my wedding to be very average. If i don't think about my parents or granny, i would like to have only a small jamuan with simple nikah. No need to do any sanding. I need bless from Allah.

p/s: This remind me of what ex Mufti Perlis said. Marriage which is halal is nowadays so hard to do while zina (haram) is so easy to do. All because of these burden thingy such as hantaran, mas kahwin & so on. To get married nowadays, some already made personal loan till up to RM10K. What is that all about?